Written by: David Mun
Artwork by: Samuel Lee
Kindness is often viewed as a weakness. Admittedly, I have fallen victim to people taking advantage of mine. But as time went by, I started to realize that kindness is not a source of weakness; it's a strength. Because it is without a doubt harder to retain your dignity and kindness when someone has wronged you than it is to be unkind to others.
Our society enforces a condescending view of kindness through messages sent by others, “you are too kind”, or "you are too good for this world”. As time passes, you are tired of hearing such messages as others never show kindness back. Here, it appears you are faced with two options: be kind and be used, or turn your back on them and remain a bit of dignity for yourself. However, a third option exists that not many are aware of in which you practice kindness without facing disappointment or resentment of unreciprocated kindness by spreading kindness from within, then exuding outwards.
The issue with people who devote themselves to spreading kindness to others, in most cases, is that they are not spreading kindness to themselves. Every time they get used, every time they are taken advantage of, they feel wronged, all the while being negligible to the fact that karma is not a direct transaction. In most cases, this selfish idea of reciprocation forces them to gather whatever is left of their dignity and protect it from the cold-hearted and vicious, or so they say, when the truth is, their approach is wrong in the first place.
Admittedly, in some ways, we need to be selfish. In a zero sum game society, it is a trait we should hone, not reject for true kindness can only be spread when one is already filled with it. Because the truth is, if you are kind to others whilst not being kind to yourself, you are trying to fill a void within you from others; it is not kindness, but a sneaky form of selfishness. When we are self-content, our acts toward others become genuine: we are kind to others not because we want something in return, but because we have enough to give.
So here is a message to the hearts that cared but were never cared for: there is plenty of kindness in the world, but if you actively spread it expecting something in return, you will not be able to find it. What this means is that you should prioritize yourself: prioritize being kind to yourself so that you can be the light to yourself and also to others. There is plenty of kindness in this world; no need to shut yourselves out.
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