Written by: TVMB
Artwork by: Jihwan Lee
One day, a man walks into a bar and comes out intoxicated. He had a terrible day. He climbs into his car, turns the key for ignition, and thrusts the engine. In an instant, the headlights shine, and the car slides into the highway. As he is driving aimlessly, relying on his dulled senses to find himself the way home, the car runs a green light and a person with it.
The question that pecked away at my conscientiousness after hearing about this story on the local morning news was not a conventional one but something that lingered in my mind long prior to watching this incident unfold before my eyes; the news was just the catalyst, and the question was, “Should he be able to forgive himself for his wrongdoing?”
I know, the question is odd, many would begin by asking, if such questions even come to mind, "should people forgive him for his actions", not himself. But the latter seemed much more interesting to me, perhaps it was the product of self-pity I was experiencing, but it stuck in my mind that warranted me to delve deeply into the topic.
It’s true, that the man decided against his better conscious to drink and drive, a clear violation of the law, and an action that puts others in jeopardy. In this case, death. Undoubtedly, the man must be punished for what he had done in accordance with the law, but should it be that he carries the burden of his guilt indefinitely?
As selfish as it may sound, and unjust, rightfully so to the victim, it is also true, at least to my limited knowledge, that the best course after committing a wrong-doing is to admit to the damage that was caused, justly pay for the action then make amends then ultimately move on. Surely the victim’s families may demand suffering for every inch of infliction mirrored upon their lost one, directed at the perpetrator for the rest of their life, but that should not prevent him from forgiving himself; because the truth is, we need to move on from our past mistakes to survive.
Think of it this way, there must be people you have hurt in your life that wish you the worst. All of us have committed wrong-doing, in varying degrees but undoubtedly so. However, no matter the crime, no matter the pain inflicted, albeit rendering it impossible to change the course of time, and prevent wrong-doing, the opportunity to do more good in life than bad is still open to exploration, and we all deserve to have a second chance. Because, and call me an optimist, the damages that we have inflicted upon others cannot be the only legacy that we leave behind in this world. Simply put, no matter your crime, you still have time to do more good in this world than the bad you spewed out.
After saying this, I am in no stance that you must never feel ashamed of your actions. In fact, you must, for whatever time required for you to truly understand your faults, willow in the pits of self-pity and hatred, for it would ensure that you may never repeat your mistakes again. But after repenting, surely must move on, and attempt to forgive yourself through spreading kindness to the world. As horrific as your crimes may be, learn the value of forgiving yourself, and focus on trying to do more good than the bad that you have spread already. Everyone deserves a second chance, and the chance after that and that of after, as long as you learn and change yourself and the world for the better.
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